Letting go of someone you love is never easy. The truth of it is, once any bond is made it’s hard to break that bond. Just like welding, when two things are bonded together, to get them apart something has to be broken. When people bond they bond at their heart, so unfortunately, when you break a bond you’re heart is where the bond has to be broken, thus the pain of heartbreak. There are so many times in life when you have to let go of someone you love, but that doesn’t mean letting go of love.
Billy Ray Cyrus recently put out a song called “Ready, Set, Don’t Go”. The opening line of that song says “she’s gotta do what she’s gotta do and I’ve gotta like it or not”. There’s nothing we can do to stop our kids from growing up. I’ve got one baby girl and every day I see her grow. She’s almost a year and has started crawling, talking, and almost walking. I know the day is going to come that I won’t want to let her go, but I’m going to have to “like it or not”. Another part of the song says “she says things are falling in place, feels like they’re falling apart. Painting this big old smile on my face to hide my broken heart.” I know I’m not going to want my daughter to leave, but her happiness is most important to me. I know she’s still going to love me. I’ll have to let her go, but the love will still be there.
My great-grandmother recently passed away. I know she is in a far better place, and no longer has to suffer the pains of the mortal body, but I wasn’t ready to let her go. There is a large hole in my heart where I will miss her, but I know someday I will see her again. I was not ready to let her go, but have had to anyway. The pain is almost unbearable at times, but I found things to help me through this hard time. I have an old blanket she made me when I was a baby. I got that blanket out of an old box I had it stored in; I’ve been using it for my baby girl and will always remember that her love is still there even though she isn’t.
Another love hard to let go of is the love we lose in a break-up. The last guy I dated, before I met the man who is now my husband, I thought for sure I would be with forever. He left for two years to serve a religious mission. I planned to patiently wait for him. Letting him go was hard; harder still was when he sent me a letter from France telling me we were over. I spoke to him once on the phone and heard none of the love he had felt before he left. I saw him once after he returned and we talked for just a few moments. The love I had for him had changed. I was hurt deeply by the things he had done to me, but when I saw him again I was okay. I still consider him a friend, but I don’t think he feels the same. The few moments I talked to him he wouldn’t look me in the eye and it seemed he only said things to try and hurt me
I gave time the chance to heal my heart before I found another, but I don’t know that it really worked. I was angry at first for the pain my ex-boyfriend had caused me. I waited faithfully for almost a year passing up date after date only to have him reject me. I soon learned I had to let myself love again before my heart could heal. I gave boys another chance and quit being so hard on my ex realizing I didn’t know what circumstances he had faced. Unconditional love for some one takes a lot more energy to give than hate or anger. Love works the heart and makes it stronger. When you love somebody it is hard to hate them. I let myself fall in love again and this time it paid off.
Love is never really lost, simply adjusted or misplaced. Don’t let go of love, just redirect it. You might face painful losses, but grow from them. Take the empty spaces you have in your heart and fill them in with love, but always leave room for more. Honor the memory of your passed love by remembering the love and happiness instead of the pain and heartbreak. Relationships are complicated some times and may cause you pain, but don’t give up. I’ve been told more than once “You don’t know what it’s like to be hurt so deep.” I have been cheated on, walked on, rejected by some, and assaulted by others. I know what it’s like be “hurt so deep”. If I had let go of love I would never have found the one I married for time and all eternity.
I once heard a story of two men. One of these men was young and claimed to have the most beautiful and perfect of hearts. He showed his heart to all, boasting of its perfection and beauty. One day while in the midst of a crowd an old man stepped forward and said his heart was more beautiful than the young man’s flawless heart. The young man and crowd laughed at the old man’s heart full of scars and jagged edges where pieces had been removed and replaced. The young man said “Mine is perfect and yours is a mess of tears and scars.” The old man replied “Yes, bit it’s those scars that make mine beautiful. The jagged edges are where I’ve given a piece of my heart to someone and replaced it with a piece of their heart given to me. The empty gouges are where I’ve given a piece away and the person didn’t return my love, the gouges stay painfully open until some day I hope they will. Do you see the true beauty of a heart?” The young man silently walked over to the man with tears running down his cheeks and gave him a piece of his heart, and the old man returned a piece of his own heart to the young man.
Letting go of some one you love is hard. Cry if you feel like it, but don’t give up. Always hold on to the love you have and the separation of death will only be temporary; have faith you can see them again and know that you will. Love lost in a break-up, no matter how painful, can be replaced if you can rise above your bitterness and try again. Remember the love, happiness, all that is good, and don’t dwell on the loss. The phrase “Time heals all wounds” has never worked for me. “Love heals all wounds” has never failed me.
